Saturday, October 27, 2007


In our days we did not have as much worldly knowledge as the modern day kids have. I think every present day kid of eight years is exposed to much ‘sex’ than what an adolescent was exposed in our days, thanks to the media. In a way it is good to know proper things in a proper way.

I still remember how not only I but all guys of my age in those days never had any chance to know about ‘the secrets of sex’. There was no chance to see or to read or to hear anything about sex. It was all hush-hush thing among close friends. So it was mostly like the characters in the story of an elephant and four blind men. One blind leading another blind led only to more confusion. Especially puberty of girls was a great enigma for us. Talking about that brought goose pimples and we were thrilled to share our information with others. I got most of the gossip about sex from my rural friends, especially during my summer visits to my native village. Each one had his own theory about sex, puberty, menstruation, masturbation etc. We were totally a confused lot. This confusion made sex more and more a mystery and we had no chance to know about it. This made sex more enigmatic and mysterious and we always talked about these matters only with our very close friends. So naturally since we had our references from fellows of our own age, it was mostly like one blind leading another blind from one dark spot to another dark spot! We were very stupid. Hot discussion on the nature of genitals of the opposite sex happened often. There were times when we were not sure how a baby would come into this world. To make matters worse comparing a cow and a woman especially in the matter of their anatomy and mode of delivery was common. This state of affairs even continued to very late period of our adolescence. Such was our ignorance in those days!

I had a cousin. His father and my father were first cousins, and they had the very same name and worked in the same school. To avoid confusion people used to call my periyappa as senior so-and-so (periya ..) and my appa was known as junior so-and-so (chinna ..). Like our fathers we also had the same first name. He was just two years senior to me. But he played the role my ‘friend-philosopher-guide’. He was the one who was unraveling the mysteries of sex to me. His house was on my way to school and church, the two places around which my early life was revolving. So I used to go to his house on my way to school or church and then we would go together. He came out with so many newer things about anything and everything. I very submissively accepted all his ‘doctrines’. Never questioned them. Except the one time when he was explaining the ‘dirtiest thing’.

Whenever he came out with anything he used to always show an air of superiority which was quite right since I was too wet behind my ears for my age and what all he said were ‘scriptures’ to me. I never dared to question his statements. But one day on our way back from school he started giving me extraordinary information on sex. He told me with the same and usual air of superiority what a married man and wife would do in private to get a child. My God! It sounded so obscene and dirty that I thought there could not be an iota of truth in what he said. I said I did not believe what he said just then. He majestically told me that was the truth and nothing but truth. I kept silent for some time mulling over on what he said. I was simply flabbergasted by this unbelievable and dirty thing. For a few moments we were walking in silence.

Then I asked my cousin: “Then … er.. how about my father and mother?”

“Well, it has to be so”, he shot the answer without a moment of hesitation. He was very cool answering my question.

Few more moments of silence. I was still trying to digest what he had said. But I could not. A flash came and I asked him: “In that case, how about your father and mother?”

This time he took some moments. Hesitated a bit. But came out with an affirmative answer. But this time it was not as authoritative as it was for the previous question.

Still I could not believe it. Our own parents. This much dirty. Oh! No, I thought. I did not believe it and wanted to prove him utterly wrong.

My next question was very much pointed and poignant too. I asked him: “If it is so, is it the same way between Mother Mary and St. Joseph?”

He was thrown off balance by this question. Clean bowled. He was dumbfounded now. I was happy that I could at last nail him down to his utter lies. How could such a dirty act be true? Could any decent human being, leave alone the divine persons, do such nasty things?

I was waiting with batted breath for his answer. This time he did not have the guts to say yes.


Thekkikattan|தெகா said...

:-) I have been taught pretty much the same way as you have learnt ;))...

we hope the future generation gets the right answer in a right way.

thanks for sharing, sam!

delphine said...

Thanks Sam,
This is a bit of nice interesting ? story. I really enjoyed reading.. And as usual your English is like that of an English Teacher's??. It is a good sign that many of our kids are taught about sex in schools. i feel it is mandatory as the kids are now so much exposed to media that carries some sort of bad sex education. Our children should be taught more about the "Abstinence" type of sex education rather than a "comprehensive type". Agree or Disagree?

pallavan said...

why need a sex edn at all? what went wrong with our professor?he became a good husband, a very good father.
Dr,i am totally against any type of sex edn.what we shall do is to ban the media.A lot's being done in other countries.Our Govt should do something to curb all such media nonsense.let our children grow as ignorant as you, I, and Professor.let the thing be a "DIRTY THING".[PROF, i liked the phrase very much.]Ignorance gave us a healthy life.No AIDS, nothing.ignorance is a bliss.
Dr,"English teacher's english?"

தருமி said...

hi pallavan
dont make me cringe by calling me Dr.! i am not one; never had that much 'masala'!

sorry, on sex education we are on opposite sides. sex is neither a holy cow nor a 'dirty' thing as many of us, including elders, think. sex is like hunger, just another physilogical and physical aspect of us. we need to know what to eat to keep us healthy. same way, we need to know what is sex. the level of knowledge varies at different ages. i have known grownups - married and having two or three children - not knowing about foreplay, orgasm etc...

poor things!

//Dr,"English teacher's english?"//
hope there is no sarcasm !

pallavan said...

my dear prof,
i know fulwell that you are not a doctor.[''if you take it lightly and enjoy the humour'']....
you are born to do surgery without getting a degree.what else would a professor do in the class? 'ARUVAI'.
...Delphi akka is the doctor.and she says that //'English is like that of an English teacher's//'.
too long an

Doctor Bruno said...

This is regarding Compulsary Service

Please see the following posts

If you have any queries or doubts, leave a comment in
and I am ready to explain

OSAI Chella said...

Saw your post through Tamilveli English Blogs! Enjoyed a lot! Oh that SEX!

English blogdom is a saner place? lol! I will be writing more soon in English with my usual loveable mistakes..

With love and wishes
Osai Chella

தருமி said...

welcome, chella.

PPattian : புபட்டியன் said...

This is interesting stuff. Really enjoyed. Pretty much happens with everyone in that age I guess.. the first time you get to know how babies are formed... yes, it sounds yukky.

Anonymous said...

:))) ... good one!

Have you seen "Oh Brian" by Monty Python? Your last line reminded me of a dialog in that movie ... Its a fun movie about Brian a neighbour of Jesus Christ.

தருமி said...

hi madura
long time ...

not even heard of that movie. anyway i will keep it my mind for any chance to lay my hands on it...

Vignesh said...

i believe everyone indian child born before the internet age can relate to this post of yours... so do i:)...
A very honest post..

U know what i did when i heard of the REAL thing for the first time... i cried it was so disgusting that i felt bad hearing it..

PS: I had written a short story in tamil reg the போலி சித்த வைத்தியர்கள்... not having a soft copy.. will possibly share it along with the movies:))

தருமி said...


//...... i cried ..// Poor thing!